Monday, August 09, 2004

Still Bouncing!

So, I am continuing to bounce/forgive, bounce/forgive for ½ hour every evening before bed. I have been doing it for 26 days now, during which time I have missed the forgiving ritual only twice because of extreme circumstances of some sort. I have to share my first documented miracle that I believe to be the result of my bounce/forgiving.......

I had a friend who I had known for many years. She had become a medical practitioner recently and I had been utilizing those skills of hers to help me with some body challenges I had been having. I had been paying her for her services whenever she indicated payment was required. Between times she and I had chatted about my health issues and she had done some research. All was well I thought.

Obviously I had been vibing some negative energy out into my world (more about this later!), because one day she emailed me a very nastygram accusing me of treating her very badly. She said it all in friendly-incorrect (bitchy) terms which shocked me (thankfully) into silence. After I had had some time to ponder all of this, I could see that if I flamed her back we would both be in an unalterable tail-spin into the pits of hell, which I did not particularly want to go through again in this lifetime! I could see that she simply did not see events the same way that I did and that she was in PAIN. What I did (remember this was in my pre-bounce/forgive existence) was apologize to her. I could, in total honesty, say to her (in email) that I was REALLY SORRY she was hurting so badly, and I was REALLY SORRY if anything I had done had made her hurt. That was all. I did not get into details about my behavior because I still thought I was right. She (minor miracle) emailed back immediately that she was also sorry and wished the best for me. That was a couple of months ago and I hadn’t seen her since.

Then I started my list of things that needed forgiving when I began the bounce thing. Of course, she was on that list. So, I bounce/forgave her. I bounce/forgave myself for vibing out that crummy scenario with her. I did it UP! and I did it DOWN! and I did it OVER and OVER and OVER. I included her and me in my forgiveness routine most every night, sometimes for several minutes, sometimes just a passing thought and on to more pressing forgivenesses.

Well, last Saturday is when the miracle happened! She sought me out at the Farmer’s and Crafts Market where I spend 4 ½ hours every Saturday morning selling honey (which is how Gordon and I make our living). She bought some honey and then sat down on the bench next to my stand. I took a deep breath, and, feeling like I was on a stage acting out the part of someone else, I went over and sat next to her! I asked her how she was doing and she responded and we had a pleasant civilized conversation! She left when I had to go take care of more customers, but we were on easy terms again.

I can hardly recognize the person I know as Laura in that behavior! It is as if I were cleansed as "pure as the driven snow" of the anger and hostility I had felt and so had she. I had let go of the "drama" of being wronged and poorly treated, for the peace and harmony of forgiveness. I do not know where this relationship will go now, but I sure am grateful to be rid of the rocks in my gut that I had carried.

So, I am gonna continue to bounce/forgive and watch for future miracles! (Who knows, maybe she has been bounce/forgiving too!)

-- Laura Solberg


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